I think that you make a really good point about the idea that people would be confused if a work only spoke of men as lovers of women -- and yet so often women in literature are defined (at least a little) by the men they love. I think that my problem is that I like a lot of those stories. I can't hate the form of romance, because I think it says something significant (if perhaps overly idealistic at times) about the power of love to overcome individual difference and the importance of community and respectful relationships to teach us about who we are and who we can be. If writing is about declaring the self, then writing romance (in any of its forms) is about declaring the self in community with others. Any relationship must take place between oneself and the fundamentally Other person, who you can't know but must trust and respect. So in a sense this romance is the template for successful (one hopes) integration of selves and others. [Digression: this is stuff I would love to write about in reference to Julie E. Czerneda's Clan Chronicles -- aliens being, of course, literally 'Other'.]
And I think that I'm concerned with the impact of my sex on my writing because I don't want to fit the stereotype (not because the stereotype is entirely negative, simply because I hate the idea of stereotypes and tend to mindlessly and stubbornly work against them): women write about other women and they write about love. I think part of this fear for me is also that I'm not sure I can write male characters anymore (or if I ever could). For me, men are the Other and slightly inaccessible.
I think that final point, about men feeling 'as women do', is spot-on. Because even the phrase 'women feel as men do' is still likening the woman to the man, defining female feelings in terms of male feelings. Rhetorically, Bronte is intelligent to do this -- her contemporary female audience would not be offended and her male audience would have a paradigm for understanding these sentiments in simple, undertsandable terms -- but she certainly isn't breaking away from the practice of defining women in terms of men.
Finally -- I'd love to read what you've written on race. Where can I find it?
no subject
I think that you make a really good point about the idea that people would be confused if a work only spoke of men as lovers of women -- and yet so often women in literature are defined (at least a little) by the men they love. I think that my problem is that I like a lot of those stories. I can't hate the form of romance, because I think it says something significant (if perhaps overly idealistic at times) about the power of love to overcome individual difference and the importance of community and respectful relationships to teach us about who we are and who we can be. If writing is about declaring the self, then writing romance (in any of its forms) is about declaring the self in community with others. Any relationship must take place between oneself and the fundamentally Other person, who you can't know but must trust and respect. So in a sense this romance is the template for successful (one hopes) integration of selves and others. [Digression: this is stuff I would love to write about in reference to Julie E. Czerneda's Clan Chronicles -- aliens being, of course, literally 'Other'.]
And I think that I'm concerned with the impact of my sex on my writing because I don't want to fit the stereotype (not because the stereotype is entirely negative, simply because I hate the idea of stereotypes and tend to mindlessly and stubbornly work against them): women write about other women and they write about love. I think part of this fear for me is also that I'm not sure I can write male characters anymore (or if I ever could). For me, men are the Other and slightly inaccessible.
I think that final point, about men feeling 'as women do', is spot-on. Because even the phrase 'women feel as men do' is still likening the woman to the man, defining female feelings in terms of male feelings. Rhetorically, Bronte is intelligent to do this -- her contemporary female audience would not be offended and her male audience would have a paradigm for understanding these sentiments in simple, undertsandable terms -- but she certainly isn't breaking away from the practice of defining women in terms of men.
Finally -- I'd love to read what you've written on race. Where can I find it?