Burning Bright

[readingredhead]

I'm done with my senior thesis.

It's so weird, honestly. Because I'm not really done -- I believe in the idea that works of writing are never finished, only abandoned. But it's time for me to abandon this, and I'm ready. It's not a bad feeling, though it's different; if anything, it's a good one.

I didn't get to work too closely with Mr. Krucli on it, but I really appreciated his support throughout. He gave me the ideas and direction I needed. And (whether or not this was intentional on his part), his being my advisor has probably caused me to produce a much better paper than I would have otherwise, because I have taken this paper as a way to win his respect. If I'd had Mrs. McClure as my advisor, I don't think I would have worked at it so hard. I wouldn't have felt that same need to impress my reader. But I've wanted Mr. Krucli's respect, and to an extent I believe I have it. That makes me feel much better about myself than the simple fact that this paper is done.

I still have so many things to do today, and tomorrow. The world never stops. But sometimes, in the midst of the running around like headless chickens, good things happen. Writing this senior thesis and getting to talk it over with Mr. Krucli hasn't been torture. It hasn't even been difficult. It's been challenging, but it's also been exciting. I wouldn't mind writing critical approaches to literature. I actually enjoyed this, which is a very good thing.

Comments

[readingredhead.livejournal.com]

Good job on you! I know I write so much about sci-fi (and so much that is sff) because at one point my father used to disdain the combined genres as useless and incapable of producing anything literary. I've grudgingly worked my way through the years to earn his respect for things other than straight-up fiction. When arguing the worth of something, it helps to have someone specific you're arguing at -- it focuses your intentions, and probably you learn something from it on the way.